ok.



every morning and night when i go shower (what. is that amazing to you?), i wash my face at the same time. and i use shokobutsu. everytime i pick up the tube of facial wash i cannot help but be bemused and wonder about the strange workings of marketing people.



see. my facial wash has an orange cap and it says it contains orange peel oil extract. if you haven't caught on to my bemusement, it's how daring it is to have a facial wash, that's for keeping your skin smooth and pimple-free and whatever, that contains an extract from a fruit that has stronger associations with pockmarked skin than tori amos has with posturing.



yes yes i admit. i am using it. so i'm a sucker too right. anyway my excuse is that this facial wash is sent to me by my mother from singapore so i had nothing to do with the selection. and if you say my mother's a sucker for buying it, perhaps you'd like to have an intimate relationship with my fist. up your ass. (if you're getting turned on, please close this browser window and try not to come back.)



anyway. it's such a crazy pitch that somehow it worked. people are actually buying and using this stuff. it doesn't smell half bad. but still i really have to hand it to them jappy folk at shokobutsu.



fyi, there's a picture of the fruit in question on the front of the tube, and lo and behold, the picture is of a completely smooth-skinned orange. with a leaf on its stem. you can tie me down and slap me around with a handbag, but i'll be damned if that picture didn't make me think that it was a peach. i had to look through the fine print at the back to see if it actually contained any peach in it. and i do that regularly, to make sure that i didn't miss anything out. it's quite hard to actually be in motion in freezing weather under a shower that squirts out hot boiling water and ice kosong at sporadic intervals, so i do quite a bit of reading in the shower.



well so you see, the people at shokobutsu not only thought that they were being daring and all that when they decided to use orange peel oil extract, they decided that they could make fun of consumers too with their derring do. they included a picture of a peach on the packaging and expected people to pick up the tube, look at it and think oh my, my face will be as smooth as an orange. and think that an orange actually looks as fucking smooth as it does in the picture. we're talking about an orange here fer fuck's sake. find me a smooth orange that feels like a peach and i'll try to find you a peach that's as rough as an orange.



anyway, you guys want a better visual than "fucking smooth", walk into your nearby provision shop and see for yourself. i'm starting to freeze here.