i think for the past month and a half or so, i have spoken less than i have spoken in my recent life. well, it's not like i usually blabber on and on and shoot my mouth off incessantly, but i have kept to myself more than usual.



weirdly, i didn't feel depressed or down or whatever. i actually felt kind of peaceful, some sort of peaceful, not speaking so much. maybe its like how a vow of silence teaches you stuff like inner peace and all that. but this lack of vocal interaction with people i see everyday really just chills me out.



just laying back and taking in the experience without the need to vocalise what im thinking or what i want to say. it's a pretty good feeling.



but i don't think this would be as fun if my day to day routine is filled with drudgery and boredom. i think it'd get me pretty down and out.



very soon, my life will be filled with that kind of day to day drudgery and boredom, and i can't say i dont want it. need some sort of stability for a while.



guess i better talk a bit more now.